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The Crush

The Crush - in which Cary Elwes makes out with a teenage girl in 1993, and it wasn't me. Alicia Silverstone is amazing and charming. She plays Adrian, a teenage girl with very rich parents, one friend, and a tenuous grasp on reality. The protagonist is supposed to be this author, played by Cary Elwes, but dude's a creep, so he's the villain to me. Reframed: this guy moves into Adrien's parents'  carriage house, in the back yard, and I guess she's not used to it being rented out, because she keeps going in there. Like, she has no sense of boundaries, and it seems like no one has ever told her "no," in her whole, beautiful life. So, Wesley, from The Princess Bride, I mean, Cary Elwes, is friendly and charming to her, and obviously flattered by the attention of a young woman. Oh, she's 14. Yeah. So, she gets obsessed with him, and he encourages this friendship by talking to her, inviting her in, spending time with her, and taking her suggestions, like attending her parents party. It is at this party that Adrien"convinces" Cary Elwes to drive her out to make out pier and makes out with the underage girl. He realizes this is a bad idea, and tries to back track, but she's now in love with him. The movie portrays this who scene as like, she puts some smooth moves on him, but he only kisses her with tongue for a few seconds before he realizes her dirty trick! How dare she think that she had a chance with the man who spent his entire evening with her (instead of adults), a man who left a party at a house they both live at, to go to a romantic setting - whatever. It's obvious.  He attempts to distance himself from her, not by going to her parents and explaining that she is acting inappropriately, or finding a new place to live, but by kindly admonishing her when he comes home and she is in his shower.  So, Adrien can't take no for an answer, and poor Cary Elwes is stuck defending his journalism work against the hi-jinx of a teenager with full access to his computer and living space. He sucks. Then he gets a nice 90's girlfriend with 90's sensibilities, so he can't play with the teenager he lives with anymore. When Adrian finds out about the girlfriend, she goes from trying to win Cary over to trying to kill his girlfriend with a beehive and some innocent charm. So, there is a dramatic conclusion where they have a stand off in an attic with a full sized carousel in it (???) and Adrien tries to kill Cary Elwes, but he punches her out, and then the teenage girl ends up in an institution, where she belongs.
     So, this movie is creepy, but way fucking worse is the "true" story this is based on, where the screenwriter of this just wrote what he thought happened to him. Making no attempt to hide the teenage girl's identity, he used her fairly unique name in the screenplay, and it made it all the way to air on TV before her family threatened to sue. So, they went back in and changed the audio to say "Adrien" instead of the girl's real name before they released it on home video. I'm not gonna say her name, because its not mine to say. I am so glad I didn't see this when I was younger. It is straight up trash. Also, the dialogue is dull, the direction sucks and the movie isn't good. But Alicia Silverstone is.




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