The Mummy

The Mummy - in which Brendan Fraser as Rick O'Connell escapes certain death multiple times, with some help from Rachael Weiss. Weiss plays Evie, a nerdy librarian with a drunk, possibly gay brother in Egypt, left there as adult orphans when their parents died at some point. Wait, in the beginning, a pharaoh is betrayed by his girlfriend and his high priest and they are both killed and the mage is named Imhotep, I think. So, several hundred years later, Evie and her bro get this map they think leads to the mysterious treasure city of Hamunaptra, and she hears there's a hot guy in town who will take you there for a fee. No, Rick is in jail, but the brother Jonathan stole the map from him before he was arrested. And sentenced to death. No, it's a key, not a map. Anyways, she saves Rick's life by purchasing his freedom from the sheriff, or whatever he is. Rick is very grateful and agrees to lead them to Hamunaptra, and is also apparently a good kisser. So, they get to going to the treasure city. On the ferry there, they meet a competing party, led by Rick's ex-friend, who betrayed him and left him to die during the war. You know damn well which war. He wears a fez. I guess those Americans are offering a lot of money. An action scene leads to the boat catching fire, and they have to walk the rest of the way to get to the camels.  They ride into the magical, hidden Hamunaptra just after dawn, and  are not discouraged by the uneasy feeling everyone seems to have. Oh, the Americans followed them in. They discover some caves and tombs and wet bodies, then this magical black book that the key fits into. Watch out for scarabs!  They get one of the ethnic guys.
    Imhotep gets out and sucks the life force out of several guys before he is whole and powerful, but his vision is still fucked up because he sucked his eyes from the skull of a guy who needed glasses. LoL. However, this leads to complications when he thinks Evie is his dead girlfriend Anhuk Sana Moon. So, obviously she gets kidnapped with the key to resurrect the girlfriend into Evie's body. Rick does some awesome stuff to save her, like going back underground, or like fighting a badass mummy and abandoning most of the treasure they find to save Evie. But they still get some of it in the end. Movie is better than the ride. But the ride is really good.