Legend - in which Tom Cruise plays a forest-person named Jack who meets a nice girl and tries to show her around. But, he makes a mistake and he takes Lili to see the Unicorns, but while she is trying to touch one, which Jack does not recommend, they are attacked by the Darkness's flying monkeys and one is killed. So, the whole magical good/evil balance is swung in the favor of Evil, and this red demon guy seems ready to secure the forest for himself. So, he is on a mission to get the Last Unicorn (not that movie) and Jack is trying to find Lili, who has run off because of guilt and fear. Or maybe the demon has kidnapped her. I should have written this synopsis much sooner. Well, the Darkness is HUGE and red and scary and Tom Cruise is super sweet and the forest is pretty nice. The bad guy doesn't win, I guess that's the important part.
Ghost Rider - in which Nic Cage plays Johnny Blaze and some rando plays Ghost Rider and Eva Mendez fails all women. To start, some teenagers play Johnny Blaze and Roxanne as a couple in love, but Johnny Blaze can't commit to her because he feels like carny trash, and his dad has cancer. So, when Johnny finds out about his dad's cancer, he gets real upset, and is therefore vulnerable when approached by a Devil, and gladly exchanges his soul for his father's health. Joke's on him, because the Devil is a jerk and as soon as the cancer is gone, Papa Blaze breaks his neck, I guess, or he is mangled by a ring of fire. Its hard to say. Sad, though. Okay, so thirty years go by before Mr. Devil cashes in his Johnny Blaze favor, but in a chilling and tragic coincidence, he does it on the ONE NIGHT Blaze has a date to reconcile with Roxanne, whom he has run into as an adult. While Blaze turns into Ghost Rider and it looks terrible, poor Roxanne (Eva Mendes) is left stood up at...

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